My Romanian Diary Day 47: Being single versus being lazy and that’s pretty much it

singleSo, I was reading today 15 Heartbreaking Signs That You’re Single.  According to this article, you are single if you feel bad about yourself, eat cupcakes, drink with girlfriends and do nothing on weekends. Which means I am single even when I am in a relationship because not even an army of boyfriends can’t prevent me from having my very lazy weekends and nights in which I adore, either I spend them alone or not. No guy in this world can stop me from eating sweets. None. In fact, if I have to choose between men and chocolate/cakes, boy, that would be a hard one. I can truly hope I will never have to choose, because someone will get hurt.

But check out these three particular signs you are single, they are so interesting.

“You don’t wash the sheets as much as you should because, screw it, it’s not like anyone else but you is sleeping in them. ”

Well, dear author, I think you have just given us a hint why you are single. Do you really wash your sheets only when you have a chance to get laid? I mean, you have feet and ass and farts and sweat going on in those sheets, even if it’s your own feet/ass/farts/sweat. Going further, please don’t tell me you apply same policy with underwear and socks. How about showers? Do you shower because another day has started/ended or because you might have sex?

“You start to let yourself go a little bit in very stereotypical ways. Like, you don’t trim your genitalia and let it turn into the Lion King 2.” First of all, I beg of you, don’t you ever trim your genitalia! Stick to the pubes, it’s enough. Second of all, do you like having a lion king down there or not? If you like it, flaunt it (I don’t mean this literally) if not, trim it already, don’t wait for a penis to come visit.

6. “You order takeout a lot because it feels weird cooking just for yourself. When you go to the market, you buy “single person food,” which usually consists of a yogurt, a single chicken breast, and a bottle of wine.” Or you are just lazy. I am hungry either I am in a relationship or not, I eat because I like to eat and because I need food to stay alive. Are you only eating to get laid? So if you are single for two years, you won’t cook for two years? Because fast food for two years will kind of make it impossible for you to ever end being single because of the fat, you know.

I wash my sheets regularly, I never trim my genitalia (god, this sounds like a pagan cruel ritual) but I do wax and shave and have mani/pedi religiously just because I find it normal to take care of myself no matter my relationship status. And I cook because I like to eat healthy.

I think the right title for this article would be 15 Heartbreaking Signs Your Self Esteem  Is Gone. If you are not happy being single, you won’t be happy with a man, because happiness comes from within, not from a man.

single kim

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13 thoughts on “My Romanian Diary Day 47: Being single versus being lazy and that’s pretty much it

  1. rebecca2000 says:

    Did you see WTF Friday post with the letter? I put that in for you. LOL I don’t wash my sheets as much as I should and I am not single. I do keep myself nice and clean there and my husband orders a lot of take out.

    Great post.

    Like

    1. Lavinia says:

      I actually even left a comment to that post but now I see it’s not posted. My laptop is screwing with me lately:)) Thank you for feeling with me, Becca, you are so sweet:)

      Like

  2. Doggy's Style says:

    This made me laugh.
    I agree those sign are so off, I wonder who writes those things and above all, who is the brilliant editor who says “Yeah, this is good shite, publish it”
    You gotta wash your sheet regularly to start with, imagine you go out a night just because and end up hooking up, what you gonna do? Take the date to a dirty stinky bed and let him/her see your jungle? Nah, didn’t think so.
    I’m taking a shower the 21st, even if the world is gonna end if I’m gonna die, I gotta die clean.

    Like

    1. Lavinia says:

      It is a stupid article because it is not about being single it is about low self esteem. I have nothing against people not changing sheets weekly or even more often or eating out/take out or not shaving their private parts, as long as this is their lifestyle and they are happy with it. Doing things just to get someone to bed seems desperate to me, is like admitting you are not good enough just the way you are. People should learn to love themselves before asking for someone else to love them.

      Like

  3. kirbysdawgblog says:

    Haha i love this post! So true.I am in a relationship yet I have lazy weekends, drink with girlfriends and eat cupcakes…. so sorry to say but this author does not have me down pat, and you either it would seem as well! And personally it was when I was single that is when I think I take care of myself the best! lol

    Like

    1. Lavinia says:

      Lazy weekends are the best and I never ever feel guilty for having them. And you are right, when you are on the market, you should try to be even more appealing than usual.

      Like

    1. Lavinia says:

      Being single doesn’t suck, if you have self-esteem and feel good in your skin. I prefer being single than dating a guy I am not completely satisfied with. You know what they are saying: If you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than what you settled for. Hence the low self-esteem.

      Like

      1. amiralul says:

        let’s say i like open minded ppl 🙂 ppl that are not afraid to be themselves 🙂 i also like to be young and have fun 🙂
        i don’t know… maybe I’m horny because my breeding instinct is way off the normal limits =))

        as for the chocolate stop eating it… you’ll get fat :))

        Like

  4. Teeny Bikini says:

    Those articles about what it means to be a single woman are so ridiculous. All women are different. Good for your for pointing out how silly it is. And clearly, chocolate is the right answer every time 🙂

    Like

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