My Romanian Diary Day 14: Rain, sleep, insomnia, autobiographies, Amelie Nothomb and Niagara Falls

It was that kind of day today. Rainy. Rain makes me sleepy. There were times during the day when I felt like locking my office door and lay down on the floor for a nap. I should request a resting room or at least a sofa. I will be probably told this is not Google or Facebook office. This is just the museum. I think they are allowed to nap at Huffington Post also. Not sure though. My mind is blurry. I can’t wait to go to sleep. I am counting the minutes. If I fall asleep right away, I will get like nine hours of sleep which is a lot. During the week I only get seven or eight. Which is not enough, that is why on Fridays I am usually on killing mode and then during the weekend I sleep like 10-11-12 a night, depending on when my neighbors have sex and such.  I would be dead in a few months if sleeping like this, for example. Or I would go crazy at least. I had insomnia from January to October and I was like a ticking bomb. Even a simple question like “how are you today” made me feel like punching people in the face. Worst time of my life ever. I don’t remember much of it though, just how exhausted I used to feel and how I hated everybody. Thank god I am back to my old self. I love my old self. My old self is fun and relaxed. And sleeps at night.

I guess I won’t be reading tonight. What a pitty!  I don’t think I told you but lately I have got the autobiography fever. I have read the autobiographies of Garcia Marquez, Phillip Roth, Nabokov and Gunter Grass and now I have next to my bed the autobiographies of Leonard Cohen and Amos Oz. I can’t wait to start them. I love getting into the minds of writers. They all have twisted minds and I simply love the magic of a twisted mind. If a twisted mind were what it takes to become a writer, then I would be entitled to a Nobel. Kidding aside, I am a weirdo. But they say being weirdo is a side effect of being awesome. So, here it is to being weirdo.

Back to reading, I have discovered Amelie Nothomb. I am currently reading  A Form of Life, consisting of her correspondence with an obese American soldier fighting in Irak. It is incredible how many reasons can push a person to write. I am reading it and thinking about myself and about the millions times in my life when writing basically saved me. Saved me from the world outside, from depression or from sadness. I tell everyone to write. It is not just about staying creative, it is about staying sane. Write down a few lines, whatever crosses your mind. Don’t speak your mind, write it instead. Writing changes perspective and it usually changes it for the better. I am not saying it works for everybody, that would be very narrow minded of me to assume. What I am saying is to give it a try. It won’t hurt you and the result might be beyond your expectations.

I strolled around the blogs a little today and I have found some interesting things. Becca is my new addiction, she has the funniest way of talking about random stuff, like parenting for example. I love this blog about theatre, I have recently discovered. Have you ever thought about theatre in Sri Lanka? Because I never did. This article made me curious about theatres  in Muslim countries or Buddhist countries so I have a new project on my list now, I mean the list with things I would like to learn more about. I have many lists, I told you I am a weirdo! Last but not least, on this very rainy, gloomy day, I looked at this amazing pictures of Niagara Falls and relived all the sensations I had when seeing it live, on a very beautiful day in May 2011. I remembered the smells, the sounds, the rainbows over the falls and about how I felt overwhelmed by the greatness of nature and by the greatness of life, that somehow, took me there, without even wishing for it. Enjoy!


5 thoughts on “My Romanian Diary Day 14: Rain, sleep, insomnia, autobiographies, Amelie Nothomb and Niagara Falls

  1. Shane says:

    I can relate very well with how insomnia makes you feel. At least, that’s the end-point of my insomnia. The snappiness. The biting off of heads.

    First, comes euphoria in a sense. During the day things are very dreamlike, I feel very creative, but also less able to handle stress or conflict.

    I haven’t read many autobiographies. In fact, I believe I can name the complete list. Rohl Dahl. Bruce Campbell. That’s it I think.

    You are a writer because you write, and for exactly the reasons you’ve talked about. Sanity, release, clarity. You’re not a wannabe writer, you simply ARE.

    Sleep well, Lavinia.




    1. Ana Lavinia says:

      Hi Shane. I love having your thoughts on my diary:) Thank you for reading it, by the way.

      Yes, insomnia made me lose my humanity. I had insomnia before, but not for ten months. It was cruel and I am glad it is over.

      Never heard of Rohl Dahl and Bruce Campbell. You made me curious. I will google them:)

      Nicely put about writers and writing. I will keep that in mind.

      Have a good day:)


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